Oh, it IS july 4, isn't it? So that's why I'm hearing a bunch of police sirens outside my window. It must be a parade.
Today my dad yells up the stairs at 9:30 to wake me up. He said, "The suns up. . .bla bla bla. . . get up. . bla bla bla. . . do you hear me?" He keeps talking until I scream back. Rather ingenius. Then he knows I got the message and I can't go down later and say that I didn't hear him.
Right now I'm trying to figure out if there's a way I can flip over without disrupting the cat that's resting his head on my legs. I decide no. I'll have to wake him up. Shoot, I wish my dad didn't make me sleep til noon. I feel like such a slob. . . Ugh. . . I'm taking an extra long shower today.
Three o'clock and waterlogged is my plan for today. Plus finishing my room. I only really got half of it done.
Ugh. . . I WAS gonna work on my room more today, but instead I had to plant ugly flowers. The thing, though, is that we had to plant them in this sluggy, snaily, wormy, earwiggy, pill buggy place with red fire ants and mosquitos. I haven't looked at my arms yet because I dont want to start scratching.
I've never planted flowers so fast in my life. I was tempted to just stick the flat in the ground. And I would have if I wasn't with Carolyn. She was the one who wanted my help, anyway.
I'm surprised I stayed out there. Usually I'd act all snotty and run inside and leave her all alone when we have to work together. But she ASKED me for help. I dunno, the point is that it was very gross.
I love Mondays and Fridays in the summer because they are the only two days where I don't have any previous commitments. I always try to do something useful. Today I took some pictures.
They are really cool. I took pictures of the garden and stuff. . . well, I'm putting them up on my site, so you'll see them.
My sister Carol bought me a shirt! She's so nice. . . well, now she is. But anyways, I would just look like a hick if it wasn't for her.
Oh, I thought that my best friend was ignoring me on MSN the night before last night but it turned out she wasn't. Because last night she came up to me and talked to me and explained it all.
Whew, good thing because I would have kicked her butt and demanded an explanation if she hadn't talked to me. And Ceira knows I can, too.
Oh BTW, the fireworks ended at 12:49 last night.
I want to do more photographing. I love it!
Every Saturday my family and I go out in service in the morning. Pa always wakes me up. But today I guess I didn't hear or something because I slept in too late and he was all like saying I was too dirty to go and bla bla bla. There's nothing I hate more than waking up to someone yelling at you, you know what I mean? I mean, what a way to start your day! It puts me in a bad mood for the whole rest of the day. And to top it off, he left without me.
He's so not-understanding of anything about me. It's been like that since I was little. He was always making me cry and stuff. And then they just say, "Oh, she's so sensitive." But I'm not. It's just HIM. I always said that we speak two different languages. He just always has a way of making me feel worthless and dirty and lazy. He calls Daniel a slug behind his back, I know he must for me, too.
But I'm not lazy. He just doesn't understand anything about me and it makes me soooooo mad. He's the only one who can genuinely make me mad. And that makes me even more mad because he's my dad.
Yup, nothing like waking up feeling worthless.
Ha ha, in the heat of anger. How strange to look back on it but a few hours later. Okay, different subject.
Wow, I can't believe that I had my room (what?) I mean website all yellow for a day. How embarassing. It looked totally ugh! Meanwhile I think that this dice is totally awesome. Lose the red, add the gray. I'm loving it! I don't think the lighter background was me, to tell you the truth.
I know black is so totally out, but I like it alot. Definetally better than that yellow I had up here. Ugh!
I'm kinda developing a dice phetish. . . (yes, I know it's supposed to be an F) can you tell? Ha ha. Well, I think it's cool.
Like my personal picture portrait up there? Well too bad, I'm taking it down as soon as I can scan an ace. or maybe a duce. . .
Sunday, June 7
Today I had a party. Well, it was really more of a get-together, but I called it a party. It was supposed to be a going away party for someone we know, but it wasn't really focused on her that much and she only got one gift and it was generally more laid back. We all called it a get-together.
One thing about these get-togethers is that everyone brings a food whether you want them to or not. There's just no stopping them. And then you ALWAYS end up with more food then you started. And it's really a trouble trying to figure out whos dishes are whos. It's funny.
I wish Stephany was there. I don't know if we would have had that much fun, but it would've been more fun with her anyways. And that one time that I thought she was ignoring me on MSN was all a big misunderstanding. She was downloading something and things kept popping up and stuff, it doens't really matter. What mattered was that she apologized and talked.
Uhh. . . yeah so I'm about ready to explode. You always skip lunch when you're planning a get-together with my congregation. Everyone's food was so good. . . Actually alot was bought from the store but whatever. What I liked the best was these veggie burgers that were all thick and juicy and stuff. We've still got alot of meat left so my family is gonna have grills tommorrow for lunch AND dinner.
By the way, this all has NOTHING to do with fourth of July. Except that we got all the cups and stuff on sale because it's post-holiday. But there's no way that me or my family is being all nationalistic and patriotic and stuff. I don't know why they have different countries, anyway. It's pointless. They just want to divide up the world. It just really bothers me. Soon enough we'll all be united, though.
Man, I can't wait.
Oh! OH! OH! We are probably going to Europe in July/August of 2003!!!! You can tell that I'm excited because of the four, yes count them, FOUR exclamation marks!!!! I so can not wait, oh man oh man oh MAN!!!! I've always wanted to get out of this country somewhere other then CAN-uh-duh . . . bleugh. . . (that's french for bla) We're probably going somewhere in like Spain. Err like in Madrid or something. My dad wants to go to Barcelona. Oh man, I love the sound of Madrid. It sounds so spyish. Of course I know it isn't, but I can still go around singing the mission impossible theme for a year until we go.
oh man oh man oh man oh MAAANNNN!!!!
I'm so excited I could almost do a smiley!!!!
And I'm still doing four exclamation marks!!!!
Gotta work on my site now.
Later.
Monday, June 8
Today I woke up at six thirty and I couldn't go back to sleep. I am bored out of my skull. And Pa wants to connect so I can't go on the net now. ARGH!
I went downstairs and it's storming so I can't watch TV. But I had a really nice conversation with my mom. She's always so busy and can't talk to her about anything anymore. So that was pretty. . err. . .umm. . .great. I told her about basically everything in the past handfull of months. It's surprising how much she didn't know about me. But she's always so busy and I don't want to interrupt her and when she's not writing her book shes always sick.
It makes me unimaginably mad.
Wednesday, July 10
Today I went to the beach. Happy happy happy.
I love going to the ba\each. I have my very own great lake to lay by. It's very good company. It always says the right things. Which isn't much, you have to really listen to hear it talk. But when it does talk, it's good.
I went with just Carolyn. Doubt she heard the lake talk, as only I usually do. And I didn't talk to her about it because she'd call me a freak. But whatever. We had a good time I guess.
We didn't really go to have fun, we went to lay and half-sleep. Which we did. I just like that so much.
I can still feel the sun on my eyes an back. I'm so going to have freckles tommorrow I can't wait. And burns, too probably. I just love the beach.
Well I have to go now. I'm playing a neverending star wars game with my brother and his friend. That's a good thing by the way. It's fun and I can actually do it and it's just funny. I like it anyways.
If I get a chihuahua I am naming it Chachi. So Paul Frank, but whatever. I like it.
Thursday, July 11
Oh, I just read Ceira's entry. *pout* I wish I knew what to say. . . I feel like such an awful friend when all I can do is watch.
Today I went downtown. I bought a freaky clown on a swing and a funky mirror cut out of letters to make the word HELP. I love funky-freaky stuff. I wish I had more stuff like that. Today was good for that.
Carolyn was cleaning out my parents closet for some extra cash and she found old ultrasound pictures of when all of us kids were in the womb. How earthy! Mine was the best. I'm gonna scan and post it up here sometime soon. And then maybe I'll print it and put it on my wall.
When I was downtown today I found some money! Two bucks, but still. It's nice to find money. Its cool to think that some anonymous stranger paid for my food and he didn't even know it or maybe even want to.
Hee hee. Too bad!
I checked my counter and people other than me and Ceira are going here! I find that weird considering how I've never told anyone about it. Wait, I guess I went to my site from two other computers so that's . . . three strangers that have seen it. And I know some were to register me for the webring. Which I got accepted for and am VERY thankful! Check it out on the bottom of my page.
Friday, July 12
Today was pretty boring. I was going to go to Mackinac Island but instead I ended up helping a friend with her business. Putting her stuff up on ebay and making a site and stuff like that.
So if anyone wants to buy some cloth diapers,
click here.
I needed to save up more money to go to the island, anyways. My mom and sister are going to the soo and I would be with them, but they're taking two other people and the car is full. Which stinks, because I'd rather be ANYWHERE than here. Shoot, I am so bored. I'm glad there's no food in the house or else I'd be eating. What REALLY stinks is that there are no batteries for the camera.
Maybe I'll just look around the house for some used batteries. Or maybe I'll draw stuff and scan. Or maybe just forget it all and be bored some more.
Have you ever thought of cutting off your hand just so that sewing it on would be something to do?
Me neither.
I put on my sister's rollerblades and was skating around the house in comercial breaks. It's the first time I had EVER rollerbladed! Carolyn had found her blades in the closet and they finally fit me. So I tried them out today. I'm just beginning, but I haven't fallen yet. This is so much easier than iceskating!
Saturday, July 13
Today was pretty boring. I didn't do much of anything. My dad is making me so mad! He's being such an idiot. He is having another one of those days where he always says the stupidest wrong things and everyone gets mad at him and stuff. The whole family is mad at him now.
Including me.
Well, I'm going to go downtown or something. I so need something to do to get out of this house. Moshpit hellhole.
My room is close to out of this house, right? Well that's where I am now. . . post-movie syndrome. I'm . . . happy. I own a freaky smile right now. I'm so glad I don't have a webcam. . .
Music, Proffessor! Here we are. . . brother's CD, Toxicity. Heh Heh. I like it. Call me crazy, but I think it's funny. Armenian. It's so cute. Maybe that's why I'm smiling. I'm so going to burn it. . .
I liked the song Aerials and that's why I wanted to listen to their other stuff. It's different but I still like it.
By the way, Reign of Fire is a good movie to watch with a dorky brother.
Oh man! My precious Waldo!!!
Wow, I never told you? My brother Daniel is moving to LA in like a month. Yeah. Boom? Totally. Well, we're all happy for him and all, but problem is, I'm heartbroken. Not about Dan, but his car. I so want it and I'm afraid that he's going on a suicide mission. That poor junk pile will never make it to California. Not over the mountains! Oh mercy no! he was going to be mine, and now he'll be gone. Forever.
My poor Waldo. . . he'll die in the mountains. I just know it. I think I'm going to cry. . . My future car. . . not anymore.
Oh, and I'll miss Daniel, too.
But hey, on the plus side I'll have basically my own internet line! Is that really a plus, though?
Sunday, July 14
I finally vacuumed my room today. By force. My dad is such an idiot about it. He doesn't see it everyday or even once a month, so what does he care? I see it everyday and I don't care. It's just my floor.
Anyways he was acting freaking retarded. Like, he said that he was going to teach me how. And he was all explaining how to vacuum. I know how to stinking use the vacuum! And then after I did it he was like, "now how do you feel?" and I'm like, "Hungry?" I knew he wanted me to say happy. Like, that I accomplished something. But there was no way I was going to do that.
He said it again. I said that I didn't really feel anything. I don't care. And he was all trying to drag it out of me and wouldn't give up. But neither would I.
Bottom line: noone won. I count it as a victory that I didn't give up, though. I like being stubborn sometimes.
I played the Star Wars game with Daniel and Jared again today. It's so cute the way that Jared acts in it. Not saying I like him or anything. He's my best friend's brother and a complete dork. (star wars? uh-huh. He's been to a convention. Yeah.) I used to have a crush on him and I so laugh about it because Stephany also had a crush on my brother. Wow. It was a weird time anyways.
Well, I wonder what tommorrow has instore for me. Microwave pizza and television. Maybe if Mom buys some AA batteries I'll take pictures. I've got some ideas. Okay, well, OH! new page!
I'm a freak.
Monday, July 15
Babysitting today. This time it was four to ten. Oiy yoiy yoiy. Not that the kids are trouble. . . nuh-uh. It's just that it was really hot. I mean, even the first grader was tired. She was constantly asking if it was past her bedtime yet. ha ha, it was so cute. She's so cute. The other day she said that she wanted to be just like me. Awww. . . So it's pretty much a simple job.
Just make sure they don't starve and entertain them basically.
But I'm pretty tired now. it was really hot today. Why is it always hot when I babysit? That's weird.
Hey my brother and I were talking before the movie the other day and he said that the one thing he regretted was not saving up money. He's moving to LA and he only has like thirty bucks. Ouch. So I'm taking out fifty bucks from my pay each month to save. I'll have 2300 by the time I graduate.
I was trying to figure out if I should give Daniel my TV when he moves or just buy him something. Because he has a DVD player but no TV. I talked to mom about it and we decided to buy him something and sell my TV and VCR for 85 bucks. (hey, I never watch it.) His roommate will probably have a TV anyways. So now I don't know what to buy him. . . I can't win.
Tuesday July 16
Today I spent HOURS designing my room. Just designing. No moving anything around or anything. I drew out two posters. My room is going to be awesome. I know I said it was awesome two weeks ago but that was TWO weeks ago! I'm just kidding. What I did then was clean. Now I'm redecorating.
It's black and white and red all over.
I'm having white walls (it's really not that boring) and red trim with black accents. On one wall I'm hanging sheer red fabric over mirrors and christmas lights. OVER it. It'll be cool. I also want zebra carpet but I'm having a nightmare of finding any affordable material. Stupid magazine giving me good ideas I can't use!
I want polka dots on my pillows and I'm making a giant cow pillow. Not cow material. A cow. Like a stuffed animal.
I'm hanging polka dot fabric in front of my two closets, too.
My dad hurt his back moving some furniture to upholster today. He was groaning all day. I hate to sound heartless, but it was getting kinda annoying. Why do I try so hard to find faults with him? I'm evil.
Run away if I haven't chopped your legs off already!
I'm serious. I'm so terrible. I really hate those girls that are all happy all the time and stuff. Bouncy, whatever. They just drive me insane. And people who always smile. And people who laugh at everything.
Which makes me mad because I laugh at everything and I smile . . . alot. And I am usually happy alot. But I don't hate me. But if I met me, I wouldn't like me. But I do like me now.
Argh, point is, I'm going insane. (DeeDee? no. . .) <= you understand that was mockery, right? Or are you too dumb? See, that's the trouble with the internet. There's no smiley to show you're mocking.
Thursday, July 18
Yesterday Carolyn ripped out all of the carpet in our upstairs hallways and the stairs. Now, we're in a REALLY old house. (100 something) and so it's all like creaky and stuff. But now without carpet it doesn't get muffled as much and it also echos. So whenever I go upstairs it always freaks me out. But I just try to remember that it was always this creaky and we just never heard it as much.
not that much to say. . . Tommorrow I'm going to Petosky. Wal-mart and JoAnn's fabrics and stuff like that. Ooh yeay.. I don't know if I really want to redo my room. . . Oh what am I saying? It will be fun. I just need to box stuff AGAIN and then move it into the hall and paint and stuff.
But the thing is that I am a horrible painter. If you could see my room. . . there's tons of paint on the ceiling and stuff. But what happened is that my mom said that we were going to paint the ceiling. So then I thought that it didn't matter if I got paint on it. So I wasn't caring. But then she said we weren't so it totally stinks now.
And I used too much paint and it all dripped and stuff. It's awful.
Friday, July 19
Today I went down to petosky and stuff. We were kinda just going all around, Mom didn't have anything specific to do, so it was my call with waht shops and stuff. So I went to Claires and got one thing for me and something for Carolyn. And then I went to Wal-Mart and I was looking around at nothing inparticular and Mom found this really cool thing that was a digital camera, camcorder, and voice recorder. And it was only forty bucks! So I got that.
I'm having alot of fun playing around with it. Of course for forty bucks, it's not that good. But I don't know. I'm trying to see if there's a way I can put the mini movies on the web. To kinda make it webcammish BUT NOT. Yeah, well. That's basically it. I played with my new toy.
Oh, and our hall is so bright white that it hurts my eyes.
Saturday, July 20
Still playing around with my toy a bit. There's not much to it.
Carolyn is going to California. Okay, see my dad is driving my brother to LA (well, a suburb) with his big van so Dan doesn't have to rent a van or risk getting stranded with his unreliable hunk of junky metal we call his car. (my precious Waldo. . . *tear*) But he doesn't want to drive back all the way from CA to Michigan alone. So Carol's going with them.
That's basically it.
I'm so not jealous. I never am. Not even when she got to go to a concert. Because first of all, I don't think I'd enjoy a concert. And second, She'll be spending more than a week with Pa. I'd be committed to an asylum by the end of that trip if I had to do that. But she stands him better than me.
So I guess for a while it will be just me and mom. And she'll be working on her book probably nonstop. And I'll have the internet all to myself. And I'll be so bored. Maybe I'll use all three of my coupons and go to the island. or something.
Well, on that note now I am kinda jealous. I love trips. But oh well, there's no way I'm going and it doesn't matter.
Hmm. . . I should start achiving.
Wednesday, July 24
Oh I am so sorry. My brother has been depriving me of the internet. For the past four days I haven't been able to blog, I thought I was going to die. See, we share the same phone line. But when he leaves for CA, I'll have it all to myself.
My gramma is coming up in like four days. I have to clean my room. Not major, but still. My mom hasn't got around to buying new guinea pig bedding, so it kinda smells a little bit. I mean, there's flies.
So yeah, I have lots to do.
Uhh. . . Carol and I made a movie with my digi-vidi-cam. It's . . . well, it's the first movie we've ever made, look in the MOVIEs link.
I'm getting a haircut in a few days. I sure needed it. I hadn't had it cut since school ended. I can put it in pigtails, for goodness sake.
Later:
Okay, I can't figure out how to put them on my site. I'll do it later. Right now it's one thiry in the morning, and I am awake against my will.
I was having a terrible time of falling asleep as I've been trying to get normal sleeping hours again, and I was just starting to fall asleep around midnight. Then a mosquito starts buzzing around my ear. So I have to turn on the light, put on my glasses, and try to kill the stupid thing.
After that was done, I settled into a comfy sleep position, light off, glasses off, and tried to sleep yet again.
And now I have the hiccups. Who gets the hiccups at one in the morning? These are the kind that hurt, too. Like, they jam against your ribs. I would say that I think they stopped, but I don't want to jinx myself.
Okay, so I'm attempting to sleep again.
Thursday, July 25
So today I'm getting my haircut. I'm making a before/after. You know what stinks is that the day of the cut, my hair just starts looking good. Isn't that just the way? Happens every time.
Next time I'm going to trick my hair and threaten it with a cutting if it doesn't coperate. Or maybe it read this and it's too late. . .
Last night (before midnight, grr) I looked through tons of hair sites for the perfect haircut. I found one perfect one and four that had attributes that I liked. Then I put them on one paper and printed and wrote what I liked about each one and stuff. I think this time my hair stylist will get the idea.
But I'm still pessimistic. . .
This morning I woke up at eight. Yeay! I'm glad that I'm getting up normal times again. I don't think I like sleeping in. However, I think I only got to sleep around two or something. So that's like only six hours.
Man, mornings are so boring. There's nothing to do. I've been so bored that I've washed my bedding and I did that yesterday already!
I suppose I can clean my room. . . and wash all my clothes.
I really don't have that many clothes. That's because I cleaned out my closets and got rid of all the stuff that doesn't fit or I never wear or I don't like. And I grew out of ALOT of clothes. There's still some stuff that doesn't fit. Like my standard black skirt. But I can't get rid of that because it's the only one I have. I hate it, though, because it goes down right above my ankles. Ugh.
So, like, I'm getting like a haircut today, and I don't like, think it will like, turn out the way I want it, so like, I'm making sure that my hairdresser, like, gets it. *twirls hair* I am like, so cute!
I was talking to like, my best friend, who is like, a cheerleader like me, and she totally thinks I'm like, spazing out! And I was like, "no, I'm not!" and she was like, "yes you are!" and I was like, "I'm so not!" and she was like, "you so are!" *twirls hair* I am like, so cute!
So then I was like talking to like, my boyfriend, who is like, a football player, and he like, said that he loved me no matter what! But like, I just want the hair to like, look good. *twirls hair* I am like, so cute!
So then I was feeling kinda like, bad, so I like, wrote a poem!
My hair is too long
I am getting a haircut
I am like, so cute!
*sigh*
One day I'm going to write a book on how to know when you're going insane.
Later:
Uhm, well, It's actually quite funny. You see, while I was online writing about how I'm getting a haircut, my hairdresser was attempting to call me and cancel because her daughter is sick. Well. I imagine that is slightly ironic although I can't quite put my finger on WHY it is.
Oh OH! Did you notice how I spelled um? Yes, it is now uHm! With an H. I was reading a blog and it wrote it with an H so I was like, "cool!"
Well so anyways, yeah.
My favorite CD got a scratch on it on my favorite song!! I think I'm going to cry. . . I am feeling so ditsy today. Well, let it be known that the CD is NOT pop. It's spanish and infact, I don't even understand them. But I still like it.
Well, I started rearranging my room and then I just like, stopped. So I suppose I should start again although Iam not happy with how it is going at the moment. What I need it a giant stuffed animal. Uh huh.
Wow, can you have two different moods at the same time? I'm feeling very ditsy and very smart and kinda bored and lazy all at the same time now.
I should move or something.
*I am like, so cute!*
July 29
Yeah, yeah, so sorry about not writing for a while, But it's not that nothing's been happening, it's just that I am mad at tripod. It is so slow on my computer for some freaked out reason so I have to go on my Mom's computer right now to get through and it's not like I can write my diary in my mom's office all the time, get it? So I'm making a new and improved better site with my blog still on it, However my blog will not be the center of attention. I don't feel like being selfish anymore. Also, there's better colors and stuff and it's just overall more cool and me. I mean, this site is so not me with the like, layout and stuff. I don't even like layouts. I like more collage-ish stuff. Well, so anyways, when it's done I will be getting back to you.
Thursday, August 1
Well, it seems like my computer is working fine now. Well, what has happened, what HAS happened. . .
I got a haircut and I'm getting new glasses. And Stephany and I made a joint site that sucks because we're using angelfire. I mean, it STINKS. I'm not even going to put a link to it on here.
At the moment there is a fly out to kill me right now. That happens too often. Just one fly in my whole room and it has to be Kamikazi. Shoot.
New layout. More me. Actually, alot of it is stolen from my new site that I need to find an FTP server host thingy for. I just can't figure it out. . .
Ugh, one reason I don't like playing that star wars roleplaing game with my brother and his friend (Which is Stephany's brother) is that he reeks. Steph's brother I mean. I don't know if it's just his breath or if he just hasn't showered in a year, but he really REALLY smells. Bad. I need to be five feet away from him at all times and Dan's room just isn't that big. It stinks no pun intended.
They put these eyedrops in my eyes at the eye doctor and they make my pupils all wide so I was squinting even though it was on the verge of storming today. (And it did storm cool, too) Anyways, it makes everything look all bubbly. If I knew what tripping out was like, I think this would be it.
Probably not, though. I guess I'll never know. *smile*
Everything looks sideways, too. Like, when I stand up straight I feel like I'm going to fall over. The table looks like it's 90 degrees and my laptop is all small on the left side and big on the right. It's so weird. It was only supposed to last five hours, but it's been about twelve, and I can still see signs of it. Maybe it'll leave when I sleep. Or maybe I'm just imagining it all. Probably.